Nailed It!

So it's Saturday night, sometime past oh-drunk-thirty.  The tones go off, and I stumble out to the squad.  I take down the info for an aggravated assault call, and we head out to the scene.

We pull up and there're a couple of FPD officers interviewing an assault victim holding a bandage on his head.  He states that he was hit upside the head with a 2x4, but he doesn't really want to go the hospital.  His scalp is pretty bloody, and he's obviously under the influence so I whip out my best drunkenese to convince him to come along with us peacefully.

He doesn't want to waste our time -- ironically, though, he's happy to argue about refusal forever on scene -- and he just wants to go home.  He finally agrees to let us bandage his head, but he still refuses to go the hospital.  Strictly speaking, he's altered, so the cops can put him in protective custody and force transport on him, but I prefer to spend a few minutes with the honey approach before pulling out the vinegar.

As I explain the c-spine procedure to him, an FPD sergeant comes up to us with a bloody 2x4.  A quick inspection of the weapon reveals a bloody nail, complete with a piece of material that looks a lot like bone and a chunk of suspicious grey-colored tissue.

The semi-routine assault call has suddenly become a pretty big deal.  The patient finally uses his head and decides a quick run to the trauma center with us might set his mind at ease.  The cops snap some quick pictures of the nail and tissue, and we head off to UMC.

We drop the patient off, and he thanks us for helping him out.  The FPD sergeant walks into the ER as we walk out, and he just might have been whistling If I Only Had a Brain as he brought the camera in to give the docs a piece of his mind.  Or something like that...